A while ago I wrote this article for IIRSM’s the Sentinel magazine and thought I would share it with a wider audience.

Grab a brew and enjoy.

I have realised that I can be myself and there are no real expectations from others, just authenticity.

There is an increasing appeal across industry today for soft skills. Often, the person with excellent soft skills can be trained in the hard skills required for the role. So, what soft skills should we focus on developing?

The most common and frequently used is communication. This includes:

Verbal – It’s usually very clear to us what the intent is during verbal communications; we understand if someone is happy because of the tone of their voice and the words they use.

Non-verbal – Body language and facial expressions say it all even though words might contraindicate the message. I’m often guilty of my face saying more than I do!

Written – This can be emails, text, and social media. Unfortunately, it is very easy to misinterpret the written word because reading it depends on the recipients thought process when reading.

Visual – Images, charts, and graphs. A painting can say different things to different people whereas a graph would usually state facts, both of which have their place when it comes to communicating a message.

Then there are teamwork skills, the qualities and abilities that allow us to work with others. Building a rapport deeper than at surface level is beneficial. Getting to know an individual, what they do and don’t like, how they prefer to communicate and what motivates them, can pay dividends for effective team working.

Building a rapport deeper than at surface level is beneficial.

Identifying and resolving problems is another soft skill and takes experience and knowledge. Skills key to effective problem solving can be creativity, active listening, analysing a situation and making an informed decision. Making an informed decision means acting upon information we have at the time.

Emotional intelligence and managing emotions are also high on the agenda. It is important we are aware of ourselves personally and accepting of any weaknesses and flaws, most importantly, the ability to adopt a growth mind-set.

Recognising and managing emotions in ourselves and others in a situation can help diffuse tension, for example a miscommunication between colleagues, to achieve the desired outcome.

Then having a broad scope of vision helps make informed decisions. Consideration for other people’s priorities and pressures, the demands of the business and a commercial awareness can all lead to a significantly better outcome.

From an individual point of view, we need to understand the impact of our work and decisions. Managing our own workload and making priorities based on information we know can help us remain mindful in day-to-day activities.

Leadership as a soft skill is not simply seniority. Leadership skills require us to set an example and motivate others to act. It is a combination of a range of soft skills including patience, active listening, and creativity, providing feedback (both positive and those difficult conversations). It also means having the ability to take calculated risks where necessary to achieve the best outcome.

We have all heard the term ‘thinking outside the box’. Using creativity to overcome an obstacle, where other methods have failed, is a valuable skill. It is important for the team to create a psychologically safe space to allow people to explore and discuss options and make observations to reach a desirable outcome.

So, have you ever set any soft skill goals for yourself?

• Observe others in communication. This could be during a meeting or even during conflict.
• Ask a trusted person for feedback and constructive criticism.
• Attend workshops and classes that focus on soft skills.
• Seek out opportunities to communicate, maybe attend a networking event.
• Put skills into practice whenever you can and expose yourself to a wide range of scenarios.
• Seek out others who can help you improve e.g., a mentor.

It is important to be honest with our strengths and weaknesses. A growth mindset means there is always room for improvement even if we don’t feel we are performing at our best all the time. Surrounding ourselves with others who provide a safe environment for us to grow is vital in learning to develop soft skills. For me, seeking out opportunities and networking has paid dividends with my soft skills. I have realised that I can be myself and there are no real expectations from others, just authenticity.

Keep it Relevant!

Melissa x